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And yet most of us get online and wonder why it always feels so stale.

It’s because YOU’RE making it stale, and you’re accepting stale conversation from others.

I may email again, saying, “If you want to know anything just ask”, etc. It’s that you probably haven’t given her a compelling reason to be. “So if a man can make you into a more engaging person by writing a witty first email, wouldn’t it make sense that you could turn a man into a more engaging person by doing the same?

but I still get no questions in return to start a conversation. If you want to know why your email correspondence online is generally flat and falls apart after a few emails, you have to look in the mirror and take responsibility for your part in it. ” “Yes, but it’s a lot easier when he says something and I can respond to him.” “I agree.

You tell your best stories and try hard to be interesting.

You spend a lot of time and energy wondering what the other person thinks of you.

The problem is that we don’t; we expect the other person to do the heavy lifting – to make the plans, to ask the silly questions, to raise the playing field.A great email will never make someone who doesn’t want to date you consider you, but it WILL tip the balance when someone is choosing between a dozen otherwise similar candidates.Who would a woman rather go out with – the boring lunkhead who asks for her number before he’s had a chance to charm her, or the witty guy whose every email she anticipates with delight? So do yourself a favor, Dwayne: stop beating up on yourself because she doesn’t sound interested.Just today, I was on the phone with a client who was sharing the same experience with me: “ It wasn’t until she showed me one really GOOD email from a guy that she started to get it. But look at the emails you write back to the boring men.He asked her a silly question and started grilling her with more and more trivia questions, teasing her about what she might win if she got all the questions right. “It made me funny in response to him,” she replied. They’re just as boring as the ones that you received.Literally millions of people (including me) who first met online are now married, and psychologists are starting to examine these relationships. One independent study surveyed almost 20,000 Americans who met their spouse online.

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